100 Questions to get to know someone – For your Date

100 Questions to get to know someone – For your Date

Our lives are full of exciting new encounters and opportunities. This is especially true when it comes to dating. Getting to know someone new holds the opportunity to connect, discover common grounds, and build a meaningful relationship. 

With our 100 Questions to get to know someone you will never have a boring date ever again. Whether it's questions for a first date or a chill couple’s date night, you'll definitely find good conversation topics for your dates here. Goodbye small talk, hello authentic connections. Are you ready for it??

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Contents


Tips for your Date

First things first. Before we jump into our deep talk questions here is a little Beginner’s guide for dating. You consider yourself an expert already? Well, let’s see how many boxes you can tick:

  1. Show genuine interest. Listen actively. This means letting the other person do the talking and respond to what he/she says. Don’t try to be smart and jump straight into an answer. 
  2. Be honest and vulnerable. When it comes to answering questions about yourself, pretending to be someone you're not won’t get you anywhere. It’ll only cause disappointment and misunderstandings. So don’t even try! 
  3. Pay attention! Check the reaction of your counterpart and respect their boundaries. Some questions might not be appropriate. This is not an interrogation! 
  4. Take a look at our different question types. Some questions are great for the first date and cbe great connection booster. Others should maybe be asked once you’ve gotten to know each other better
  5. Treat your date partner with respect, obvs. Be open to different opinions, and maintain an open mindset. Wouldn’t the world be such a boring place if we all just had the same opinion?

    The “right” Topics for Conversation

    What do people generally talk about during first dates? What are “safe”, go-to questions? 

    Believe it or not, there is a statistic for this. According to the Statista Research Department, the preferred topics on first dates are primarily stories from everyday life, aspirations and plans for the future, as well as travel and work. 

    We got you! A lot of our questions cover these topic areas. And there’s even more! After all, with our questions, you should be able to get beyond the initial first date. 

    All in all, there is no one size fits all for the “right” date questions and topics to talk about. Pick up on the topics that your date is enthusiastic about and find out whether you share some of those passions. 

    Our 100 questions will definitely give you enough food for thought for an inspiring conversation. Now, without further ado, let’s jump in!

    First Date Questions 
    You're wondering, how to start a conversation on a date? These first date topics provide more light hearted conversations, making them particularly suitable for first dates and relaxed conversations. They can also be helpful for getting to know someone via chat e.g. on Apps  like WhatsApp, Tinder or others.

    1. What was your highlight of the week?
    2. Who is your role model?
    3. What was the last thing you learned?
    4. What was your most beautiful trip?
    5. What are you passionate about?
    6. What was the last thing you laughed about?
    7. What are your goals for this year?
    8. What app has made a big difference in your life?
    9. What was your scariest vacation?
    10. What excites you about your profession?
    11. What was the most absurd trend you ever participated in?
    12. Where is your favorite place in the city and why?
    13. What is your life motto?
    14. What positive experience has shaped you a lot?
    15. What three items would you save from your home if there was a fire?

      Funny Questions to get to know someone

      Just have fun! Sharing a fun moment and laughing together is a great way to deepen your connection. Our funny dating questions will help you create lighthearted and fun convos.  You may uncover some  entertaining anecdotes and unexpected answers from your date.

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      1. Which rejection will always remain a bad memory for you?
      2. Which villain do you secretly sympathize with?
      3. The worst pick-up line you've ever used?
      4. What are you addicted to?
      5. Who was your childhood crush?
      6. Which animal are you afraid of?
      7. Have your parents ever done something crazy for you?
      8. How can you tell if someone is an asshole?
      9. What is the craziest thing you've ever done? 
      10. Which celebrity do you identify most with?
      11. What is your secret talent?
      12. What nickname did you have as a child?
      13. What would you do if you won the lottery?
      14. What rumor has been spread about you before?
      15. What romantic fantasies did you have as a teenager?

        You can find more funny questions over here. (Link to 100 Questions for couples)

        Intimate Questions to get to know someone

        Ask these questions to really dig deep. These questions will create trust and let you uncover new stories and a whole new side of your date.  Your mission will be to  find the right balance between being curious but yet sensitive to your counterpart’s boundaries.

        1. What was the last adventure you’ve had?
        2. What behavior of other people makes you particularly angry?
        3. What is your best memory of your school days/ childhood?
        4. Where does your comfort zone begin and end?
        5. Which joint values are important to you in a partner?
        6. In what ways have you changed in the last few years?
        7. Which three words describe you best?
        8. What would you like to work on regarding yourself?
        9. What gives you energy?
        10. What was your favorite toy as a child?
        11. What is your biggest fear?
        12. How do you deal with self-doubt?
        13. What role does friendship play for you?
        14. What role does your past play today?
        15. Who is the most important person in your life?
        16. Who did you once do a great wrong?
        17. What kind of person would you like to have been when you are no longer?
        18. What title would you give to this chapter of your life?
        19. Which injury from past relationships has not healed yet or was particularly difficult to heal?
        20. How would your family describe you?
        21. How would your friends describe you?
        22. What were you known for at school? 
        23. Which of your character traits do you like least?
        24. What are you most proud of?
        25. Have you ever had a crush on a friend?
        26. What role does self-reflection play in your life?
        27. Are you more extroverted or introverted?
        28. Is there a challenge that you could not overcome?
        29. What qualities about yourself do you like best?
        30. What personal question have you always wanted to ask me?

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        Deep Questions to get to know someone

        The beauty of deep questions is that they allow you to get to know yourself better while establishing a connection with someone else. With these deep conversation starters you can go beyond ordinary everyday topics. Talk about dreams, values and what really defines you. Go big! These are the questions to fall in love with a person.

        1. What was the most beautiful encounter of your life?
        2. What makes us humans grow?
        3. How do you imagine your funeral?
        4. What would tell your 15 year old “you” ?
        5. How do you define beauty?
        6. Are you concerned about making a difference to the world?
        7. Is there a piece of wisdom or a quote that guides you?
        8. What role does gratitude play in your life?
        9. Who bears the greatest responsibility for the current state of the earth?
        10. How should one deal with mistakes at best?
        11. What gives you a sense of freedom?
        12. In which situations is lying justified?
        13. What does success mean to you?
        14. How do you define having a “fulfilled” life?
        15. What role does spirituality play in your life?
        16. Is the digital age an enrichment for human kind?
        17. Which wish would you like to fulfill soon?
        18. What was your last good deed?
        19. What color does life have to you?
        20. What makes a true friend?
        21. When does superstition become dangerous?
        22. Do you believe in heterosexual role models?
        23. What does personal growth mean to you?
        24. Is there something you have always wanted to do but have not yet done?
        25. What do other people often think about you that actually is not true?

          Relationship questions to get to know someone

          Not yet ready for THE relationship talk? With these questions, you can get to know your date in the role of a partner and imagine what the future with him/her could look like. Especially at the beginning, it's good to check if your life plans fit. For your first date, these questions might be a bit much. Keep them in mind for later, they will come in handy, somewhere between first date THE relationship talk! 

          1. What would be a dealbreaker in a relationship?
          2. What are you looking for, relationship wise?
          3. Is there something you think you're still missing in life?
          4. How would you describe me to your friends?
          5. What’s your life plan? 
          6. How do you feel about our getting to know each other?
          7. How important is your family to you?
          8. Would you like to start a family yourself?
          9. What career goals do you still want to achieve?
          10. What are you looking for in a relationship and partner?
          11. How do you deal with conflicts within your relationships?
          12. What was missing in your last relationship?
          13. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
          14. How long did your longest relationship last?
          15. What about me has aroused your interest?

          Questions you shouldn't ask your date

          Don’t just fire off those questions like a lie detector test. Read the room. Every person has different boundaries and comfort zones. Generally, our questions are a great starting point to have more meaningful convos and skip the superficial small talk. 

          However, there are some topics you should definitely skip in the beginning to increase your chances for a second date:

          • Questions about salary and financial status: Money is a sensitive topic and shouldn’t be your focus when you’re getting to know someone.
          • Questions related to appearances: Questions targeting physical appearance, such as weight, can make people insecure and hurt, trigger insecurities and are inappropriate.
            • Sexual questions: It's best to refrain from asking sexual questions unless both parties feel comfortable with it and have already established open communication about it.

              Off you go

              We hope that our 100 questions to get to know someone will help you have engaging and intimate conversations. You can use the questions as inspiration to find conversation topics or ask them exactly as they are here. 

              What matters most in the end is that you get to know your counterpart in a meaningful, intimate way.We wish you lots of fun times with our 100 questions to get to know someone!

              Beyond the first date already? Good for you! Feel free to check out our questions for couples as well!
              Back to blog

              Meet the Author

              Heike Kraft


              Far too often, couples break up, not because they're not a match... but because they don't have the right "tools" to resolve their conflicts. As the founder of LoveLane, I want to help couples love more consciously and appreciate each other more. In the last few years, I have built many different digital products for companies, including a self-coaching app. Through my training as an integral coach and from personal experiences, interpersonal relationships have become even more important to me. I'm really excited to be able to bring these two areas of experience together at LoveLane and help couples love more.